Incidental Classes At IIT-KGP

The class was 'almost' silent, even with no teacher. Obviously, it was first class and that too at IIT.

'Sir' entered and now the class was 'completely' silent. Without a single word, he wrote a question on board

"There is a linear programming problem of maximization. what is its dual problem?"

result......?? 'deadly silence'. (...remember 'various degrees of silence" in 5 point sm1, it was exact situation.)

As 'fb' always asks - what's on your mind? In my mind was, 'dude, you have one question....?? I have two,

"What is linear programming and what is maximization??"

A few more similar questions and we became familiar with these strange questions.....as they all were 'equally strange'.

After not getting any response from students...(which he didn't expected anyway ...),  he himself answered all his questions....., with expression like "how did you all 'got through' GATE and got admission here...??". ( you don't know....?? exactly as Harry got admission to Hogwarts.. and I didn't 'came through' GATE... I apparated.!!)

Then he explained his marking schemes (a short murmur in class n silence once again).

he said,

"50 marks for end sem exam - I can't help you on this" (class went blank).

"30 marks for mid sem exam - I can't help you on this too" (class went blanker).

"20 marks for sessionals......hmmmm" ( class got some hope..).

"10 marks will be given by my research assistant", ( he will give 10+ assignments with 5 to 10 questions per assignment. i.e. for submitting 60-70 questions you get 10 marks....how generous..!!) class went to 'OMG' mode.

"and out of my share of 10 marks, i always give 10 out of 10......"(wow....at least 10 marks for sure..  but alas....he was not complete...)" Provided, you attend all the classes". he continued, "for every class you miss, (....even with application signed by director) i deduct 1 mark" (...n then he laughed.... sinisterly)

.....ohhh, height of generosity..!! class went to 'WTF' mode.

This is how it began. The subject is called QMDM. name exactly portrays its character of complications. Some call it 'Decision Making', some 'Decision Modelling', some 'Models of Decision Making', some 'Methods of Decision Modelling'. anyway.... we settled at 'D for Decision'.... that will do.

Then came a method of solving, called 'SIMPLEX'. dude, one of the best misnomers I have come across. one unanimous decision after class was, it's NOT SIMPLEx....( with normal simplex, to dual simplex, to revised simplex.... messy goes messier).

If West Bengal should NOT be called poschimbongo, simplex should be called COMPLEX.

after 50 odd minutes of solving 'simplex', he again put a question for us,

'How much marks do you think you get if you solve up to here?

(when the teacher thinks he is losing his student's attention, he starts talking about marks..... and yes, he succeeds)

As he was anyway not expecting anything more than attention, he himself answered his own question - '2 marks out of 10'(..followed by the same sinister smile).

I thought.... excellent, 2 marks in 50 minutes....so in given time slots of 180 minutes(for end sem) and 120 minutes(for mid sem), no one should expect anything more than 5 or 7 marks. ( I keep doing my own decision modeling inside my head)

cool..... I was anyway not getting more than that, its good that no1 is getting......( relative grading u know.....iit grading system).

he said, "to get full marks, you should write complete answers" ( ..., not questions....??? why not..??)

He added " now if you get the answers correct and even write it complete, and I find you applied some wrong concept in solving.......how much marks do you expect?"

( I thought of screaming '2 marks out of 10'......, only thought ) I was right.

he continued,

"2 marks out of 10, with remarks on answer 'INCIDENTALLY CORRECT'".

(same remark i would give if I get 10 out of 10.... )

Now he realized that he was getting a bit harsh on us (....ohh, we are ENGINEERS n ARCHITECTS dude, gone through these for 4-5 years n now we don't give a $#!^.)

So he added " if someone of you comes to me for increasing marks, in some exceptional case, I may consider your plea and increase your marks from 2 to 2.25"( scary laugh continues.....)

magnanimity at its best...

And he has a habit of randomly peeping into someone's notebook to check what he/she has done and how. had he liked cleanness, i would have tried to take front row in each of his classes. but unfortunately he doesn't. he wants solutions. complete solutions.

Thanks to some phD scholars, who are always ready with solutions to any problem we ever discussed in class. ( or even d problems we never did)

and for us, there is an unsaid rule for this class,

" if you want to be safe, take the most 'obscured' corner seat"

Thanks again to those 'ready with solution' phD scholars, who are willing to occupy the front rows and other accessible seats....!!

Ph.D. scholars

With the progression of topics from graphical method, simplex, dual simplex, revised simplex, duality concept, sensitivity analysis, transportation, transhipment and assignment problems.....the quest to 'obscured seat' increased exponentially.

Mind you, these transhipment problems are simplex's dad. vogel's approximation ( approximation...???? vogel dude, don't approximate, be sure in your life...n plzzz don't mess up ours...its already.) seems like solving 'sudoku' to some guys..., only difference is that sudoku is easier.

In the last class before mid sem, he again asked one question

"what do you want, many easy questions or few tough questions?"

( as if it really makes any difference, in any case '2 marks out of 10'.)

At the end of two odd months, as we are into the mid sem exams....I also have one question -

'sir, if you ask 10 questions in the exam, how many answers do you expect? '

(2 out of 10....???  obviously. )

And one thing to say,

 'If I get 10 out of 10 marks in some question and more than 2 solutions are correct, I must say  

"INCIDENTALLY CORRECT "'.