The Darkest Night

College is the best time of life.

Having a gang of friends,

Making travel plan that never happen,

Planning birthday surprises that are not much of a surprise,

Bunking lecture and end up running into the professor,

Some crushes,

Endless laughter,

Boundless love,

Countless memories.

College truly is the best time of life.

But there is another side to it

That is meant to be endured in silence,

The nights when demons of self doubt feed on happiness.

The nights when death ceases to be scary.

It rather seems like an easy way

Out of the countless chaos.

I muffle my cries using a pillow,

Lest someone hears it.

'You have it easy' they'll say.

'So many people have it worse.

Stop whining!'

How can I expect them to understand my chaos,

When I myself have barely made peace with it.

Finally with neither energy nor tears left

I fall asleep.

The morning sunshine knocks the window

As if to tell me I had survived another night

The puffy eyes narrated the story of the night

I covered it with eye liner and mascara

And perfected the lip gloss smile

To tell people I'm fine.

As I walked through the corridor like I have no worries in the world,

'Your eyes look beautiful today' someone said.

I laughed at the irony.