All it takes is a little courage

Given a choice Malini would not come home,but this time she was left with no other option . Her college and hostel were closed sine die due to the upsurge of the second wave of COVID-19,the dreaded ‘C’ . 

Every time...she has to wage a war with herself or fight a battle with parents when home.

She loathes to be at her own place as her parents are compulsive naggers and don't let her be at peace.Her homecoming is always tagged with marriage proposals.She has tried her best to convince her parents about her goals and aspirations in life but to no avail.They would pounce upon her soul and being like an unannounced thundershower,pierce her with insinuations.Safe and snug embrace of haven she truly missed every time.

She has come prepared with her armor and shield this time. She has enough words and phrases in her repertoire to fend her point.A lone warrior is ready.

“Malini!Take your bath.I am keeping the towel inside the wash room.Your luggage is kept in the verandah.Bring those inside after sanitizing.We are through such difficult times...this pandemic is doing rounds not leaving any room to breathe.”

“Yes amma!I will have a quick bath and then have breakfast.I am starving.I was scared to take out the mask and have something although I had dinner packet with me.Please prepare filter coffee.Instant coffee is not the kind of brew I like.But,as you know-one cannot have things of choice all the time...esp in the hostel.”

“The geyser is on Malini,switch it off after use.”

 “O.k.Amma.”

 Back in her room, she flung herself on the couch for sometime before she cuddled her teddies on the bed.One pink, the other pristine white.Her birthday present from mom.How much she is into her heart and soul !She always found and brought stuff of her choice.She is completely changed now though.Is it the truth or, she has become fault finding??

The answer eluded her so also a brief spell of nap.

Her mom came inquiring about health and she safely avoided her long stay with a bit of gesture and by saying-”It is only fatigue amma.I shall be ok tomorrow.”

It worked out.

After all-”Brevity is the soul of wit.”

She took the half finished novel in hand and tried to read a few pages.

The act did not soothe her senses nor regale.

The angst was overpowering and dragged her out of the shell of peace and serenity.

Evening caught unawares calming the glaring sun.The sun was ready to nestle in the faraway west.The chirps,warbles slowly faded as darkness loomed large.

She had her dinner.Her mother waited for her father.Venkatesh,her father is a cloth merchant.He visited the city off and on as per work schedule and came late.

 Malini had lost touch of speaking to her father in these six months and struggled to begin but could not.Yet she wished him a goodnight sleep.As their eyes met,she could see his affection for her.She gave him a hug, that invoked the oozing process of love.She could feel the warmth.

“Is she at fault or they are?”-She struggled to find an answer.

“Why are things not as they were before and changed for the worse?Is it a mere communication gap or something graver?”

She was unable to fathom.Yet knew-her phobia was not built in a day.

 In the hostel,she was always sleepy.At times skipped dinner.Her mind is constantly bugged by studies and excellence.She had woven her silk gossamer dreams into a tapestry of success.She pined to excel , earn a name for self and do her parents proud.

Her parents in turn could not visualize her longing for soaring.This has been the greatest disappointment in her life.That exclusive feel of achievement she pined for,could palpate in her dreams.Her fervent prayers too hinged on some magical happening that would topsy turvy her parent’s set of prejudices and belief system.

She had always wished to blurt out the blatant truth-

But, her heart skipped beats and she was mired in a moral dilemma of 'to be' or,'not to be'.

Well,this time,she has come well rehearsed.Madhu and Kunti- Her roommates have helped her in this endeavor.She has been admonished not to be rude nor overdo the act.

She got up next morning to a loud conversation.

Venkatesh was inquiring from her mother if there was any kind of discussion the mother and the daughter duo had.

“I went there twice.She was reading a book.She looked tired and I could not initiate.”

“What kind of a mother are you?You don't want your daughter to be settled happily by marrying a suave guy with a handsome salary.I had given you the list.Now I am sure,you must not have gone through.They are jewels and with much research in matrimonial sites I have finalized these ten guys.All of them belong to our caste-I have verified their gotras too.This has not been easy.An uphill and onerous task.It took me and Ramaya a complete fortnight.You will not understand.”

Now Malini has to brave it as she is deprived of the much needed sleep and she does it.

“Dad!Why are you shouting and wasting such a calm and serene morning?What mistake mom has committed?Stop chiding her.I shall not get married to someone you choose or select from the damn sites.I am not a kid any more.I have a dream to pursue,find a purpose to my living and give back to the society in whatever form I can.I need a partner who understands me,compliments and supports my endeavors.He may not have a white collar job,fat pay package,a limousine or a huge house to live in,yet he has to be an intense human being, capable of listening to whispers of the needy,susurration of divine call and act accordingly.”

“I want to lead a happy life dad,please understand.No amount of pelf can fetch this.”

“The kind of life mom is leading -I strongly abhor.She does not have a choice of her own.Everything is simply being thrust upon her.Have you ever tried to listen to her heart’s murmurs?

I am sure,these things must not have occurred to you even once.You are a deaf person,so far as subtleties are concerned.”

“I beg of you dad!Please do not make my life miserable each time I visit home.If you cannot support me then, please do not beguile me too.”

Malini was on the verge of tears.Her whole body was shaking out of exertion and exasperation.Her mom was standing beside, with her head down.Her father’s eye balls wore bulging look ...perhaps he was unable to digest the spat of this order.The eye balls too sprouted in utter disbelief.

Rain started like a metaphorical setting.The big drops hit the parched demeanor of earth inducing petrichor .None of them was in a mood to enjoy this sensuous scene as each felt guilty for having crossed the limits of outpourings.

The father and the daughter duo could vent their ire through words.

Mrinalini,The mother redeemed her fault -’absolute acceptance’ through silence.