We never know what turns our lives may take the very next second. I could never have thought in wildest of my imaginations that the most pleasant night of my life will turn into one of the most dreaded one. The night when I had the most terrible encounter of my life with as horrid a beast you could ever imagine and that also at the tender age of sixteen.
I was in my 12th standard at that time and was very excited to participate in a dance competition to be held at AVR auditorium.I got dressed myself in a blouse and a long skirt and wrapped a shawl around. The function was about to begin when we heard the sound of bullets and somebody told us that some terrorists have attacked the building.
"Run for your life!" Somebody screamed and a stampede ensued.
I ran among the crowd not knowing where to go. Suddenly someone pushed me down and I was about to be trampled under numerous feets when two huge hands held me by my waist and carried me away.
A few seconds later, I found myself in a dimly lit room. I saw the man who had saved me for the very first time, if you could call him a man. His features were more like that of a beast. He was a coal dark man in his late twenties with a very badly scarred face. He was tall and strong like those demons in the movies. Then my gaze fell on myself. I had lost my shawl somewhere in the stampede. My blouse was too small and barely covered my bosom. My skirt was too low on my waist. It won't be wrong to say that I was standing almost nude in front of that horrible beast. I was so badly scared that I couldn't think of even covering up my nudity as much as I could with my hands. Instead, I kept staring at him with a deadly pale face and a vigorously heaving chest. He must have thought it to be an open invitation as the very next moment he cupped my little face within his enormous rough hands and pulled me closer to him. His harsh touch jolted me and brought me back to my senses.
I screamed and ran out into the stampede. I thought it was better to become a victim to one of those bullets rather than being a play-toy in the hands of that beast for a whole night. But his strong hands would just not let me go. He pulled me back towards him. I tried to push him away but couldn't as I was like a petty doll in the mighty hands of that demon. I imagined the atrocity of things that could happen to me that night. I thought of heinous things that he could do to me till sun breaks tomorrow. I could already feel his hands all over my barely clad body. His rough hands were already cutting my soft skin. I presumed everything - the barbarous outrage of my modesty, the unbearable pain of his tortures, the incessant flow of tears, the pitiable screams, the ghastly injured body and a traumatized soul.
"Will I survive it all with my sanity still intact? Isn't that too much atrocious a torture for a sixteen year old to bear? Will I ever be able to see the sunrise again after this beast satiates his hunger by feasting upon me?"
Those thoughts weakened me and my struggle with him and tore me apart. The frightening stampede, my unveiled nudity, the vulnerability in the hands of a demon from the hell - all were enough to rob a young teenager off her senses and I fell unconscious in his arms as if it were a self imposed surrender of my weak body and unshielded modesty to his immense strength.
I don't how many hours have passed by before I came to senses again. We were in a narrow tunnel. He had held my unconsiouss body tightly in his arms to hold me upright. As soon as consciousness dawned upon me, I ran a quick check on myself. I could feel that a few hooks of my blouse had been ripped. It had slid a bit lower on my bosom as my baby breasts pressed hard against his robust chest and were deeply in pain. I had no idea how long I had remained unconscious and meanwhile what this devil had been doing to me!
I heard a few footsteps passing by the tunnel. I broke loose from his arresting arms and screamed for help. He held my hands tightly behind my back and concealed my mouth with his. I felt as if being injected simultaneously with a thousand tantalizing intoxicants. I thought he would rip my lips off my face. But he kissed me as tenderly as a man could kiss a girl. It was on that fateful night when I had first tasted the fervor of a man's lips. I had not been kissed by a man ever before. The warmth of his kiss almost melted my heart. I felt as if losing myself to him.
"What are you doing to me?" I moaned, "have you drugged me?"
I felt as if going deeper and deeper into sedation with each press of his lips on mine. The footsteps faded and the darkness seemed to enter my eyes. I would have fainted again if he hadn't let go of my lips. I felt dizzy as an aftermath of "the kiss". He cuddled me close to his chest like a mother cuddles her baby and whispered something into my ears about being a beautiful girl or something, which I couldn't decipher in my stupefied state. He put one of his arms around my waist to support me. And with the other, he reassuringly stroked my back as if rocking a child to sleep. I felt another one of those hooks of my blouse coming off and the attire slid a bit more of me by the rough touch of his hands. But it didn't bothered me anymore as I felt safe in his embrace. I no longer felt any need to shield myself from him as if I have gifted myself to him in return of the "kiss". I rested my head on his chest and slept quietly as if being sedated by the ardor of his kiss.
The chilling cold woke me up and I found myself shivering as my meager apparel was not able to combat the cold.
"Have some," he said as he passed me a bottle which I cognized as some alcoholic drink.
"Don't think you can fool me. You want to make me drunk so that you can easily rape me."
"I don't need this," he said pointing towards the bottle, "to do 'that' to you. A tight slap is enough to knock you off your senses and to keep you so the whole night."
The intensity of his words made me gape and he stuffed the bottle into my mouth and poured its contents down my throat. I coughed and tried to vomit out the terribly bitter liquid. A little later, the liquor took its toll over me and made me free to break all the bonds of modesty. I pulled him down on me and said, "I love you!"
I bound him in a warm embrace and the warmth of his body warded off the cold and made me drift to sleep.
The next morning, I woke up on a hospital bed and saw my grieving parents talking with the doctor through my drooping eyes.
"Mr Sharma," the doctor said to my father, "I'm afraid your daughter has been subjected to physical assault. We have to run some tests on her."
They had found me unconscious and almost naked with a half torn blouse on, bleeding and swollen lips and marks of struggle on the body which was enough to pronounce me a victim.
"What tests, doctor?"
"HIV and pregnancy tests."
How could I tell them that a beast had so lovingly assaulted my lips and made me pregnant with his love. All the tests turned out to be negative as I was sure that he was not the kind of man who would take advantage of a meek and frightened sixteen year old girl. But the doctors preferred to believe that it may be a timely rescue which has saved me. I was sent to a psychiatrist for the post trauma care. She asked me to tell her everything that has happened to me....and those "dirty" deeds that he has done to me so that she could help me get rid of the memories of the traumatic night.
"I want to treasure those memories forever in my heart and wish that such a night may come again and again in my life so that he could do those things all over again to me." I said as I walked out of her cabin and chuckled as I saw her jaw fall.