Self-dependent Woman

“Single Woman…!!! Is not it so disgusting…? How is your life? Don’t you feel lonely? Don’t you feel anyone to have to fulfill your requirements?”- this was a question put in front of me by one of my female colleague Nita, while we were having a casual walk post-lunch, after coming to know that I have shifted to a new remote place as part of my job transfer, leaving my house in a metro city…

I just smiled and told “Being single in Indian society, accepting status in the public, becoming independent in each and every aspect of life is not so easy. I feel really great that I am able to lead my life so respectfully and gracefully”.

“Marriage solves all the problems…” Nita said giving a relaxing stature…

“It depends…. how is everyone’s life… you cannot say that its always true…” I said.

“By the way, you didn’t even try to convince your manager in continuing at your base location, you are so smart and pretty, he could have agreed upon your proposal…” Nita asked me mixed with a surprise tone.

“I was single and this is the reason why they told me to relocate to a different place. They cannot say this to any woman with a family… that you can easily understand, as you are one too! I had heard that gender discrimination plays a huge role in professional roles, responsibilities and compensation, but for the first time, I experienced that marital status plays even an important role in work location selection and I could not understand what is the role of my smartness and beauty in this agreement?” I said.

“Anyway, how much hike did you get to come here….?” Nita asked

“It was a promotion, so hike came in that slot… that’s it… nothing more.” I replied

“Oh, so you got a promotion too…” Nita told with a jealous voice giving a crooked look towards me.

“Uffhhh… promotion! Its just a change of designation. I was handling the same responsibilities 5 yrs back, when I had joined in this organization, with a designation two levels lower than my current. Yes, I agree, now I manage two products, with more number of customers, a bigger team and solving more critical challenges… that’s it. But, I have much more potential than what I am doing now. So, these promotion and hike does not matter for me.” I said.

“So, why don’t you shift to a different organization where you can get all opportunities those you are looking for…” Nita said in a very doubtful voice.

“Yes, I will… but not getting any interview calls in the city of my base location and I am not much flexible in shifting to a different Country or City…” I said in a very depressed voice.

“Heyyy… what else can be more enjoyable, if you get a job in foreign Country… you are single… you can enjoy like anything… no one is there to see you…” Nita said.

“Humm… first few days will be enjoyable, but after that I used to get bored with the same daily routine, here at least I have so many things to do, but there, I don't know why I feel like a prisoner…. I could have enjoyed it if I would be with my husband…. but sadly, I don’t have any….” –I replied back casually, giving a smile…

“What is the need of husband… if you are single, then you can enjoy with many people… anyway how many times have you been to onsite..?” Nita asked so cleverly…

“It just depends on people’s perception….” I said and kept quiet for few minutes.

“This person never allows me to sit peacefully, even for a minute…. every hour he used to send me a message…” Nita said while checking her whatsapp messages…

“You are too lucky, for having such a loving husband…” I said..

“Husband…!!! You know Dr. Bhupathi, who was the product owner of your product before you… he is the guy…Actually, he has arranged one interview for me, in his current Organisation, it will be just a formality, but my job offer is ready and you know the location is Bangalore, I am too happy…” Nita said.

“Yes, I have heard about him… all the previous documents which were lying in my product’s repository were signed off by him. He was a doctor by education, but techno functional consultant by profession, technically very sound and having a flirting nature towards the girls….If I am not wrong!” – I replied.

“Yup… he is very helpful towards the girls… and you should know how to take advantage of this kind of nature…Its not bad… and If you say, shall I talk with him regarding your job in Bangalore….?” Nita said.

“No…. never. I am very much happy in my current job and location. When the time comes, my hard work will give me the result. No-one has ever received anything more than or before the time“ – I said in a little rude voice.

“And, where is your husband….?” I asked just casually…

“He is in Singapore…” Nita replied….

“So, once he returns back to India, he will return back to Bangalore?” I asked

“No, he will return back here… as his parents stay here” Nita replied

“Then, again, you have to return back here, once your husband come back here, right…?” I asked so curiously…

“Yes, I will return back to the same, my current organization…” Nita said.

“If you know, that one day you have to return back, then why are you leaving now…? anyway there is no one of your own in Bangalore….Why are you going there… your husband does not ask you the reason of going there…? Your in-laws have never told you not to go…?” –I said.

“I am a working and independent woman… no one is having any right to tell me anything… I am going there just for having a change, a fun filled life with Dr. Bhupathi” Nita said and slept on the lawn closing her eyes…

“That why… I said marriage solves all the problems, you just get married and see how all the problems are getting vanished from your life…” Nita told keeping her eyes closed, lying in the lawn…

“Thank you!” I told and gave a smile.

“I didn’t get you…” Nita said surprisingly

After some moments, breaking the silence I said…“You better understand…! Its individual’s perception… that’s it…nothing beyond than that…. These are not my problems… these are my friends, which are making me more strong day by day, by handling on my own, I love my life and I enjoy it the most… Why lose your self-respect in front of someone? And that is to because of what reason? And this is the reason why I live my life so gracefully and respectfully, might not be attractive as per your views. It does not take a few seconds to lose everything, but takes long years to build and come up to this state. Its not easy, but the self-satisfaction that you get of this is the most expensive gift of the life. And this is the definition of self-dependent, rather than just earning money!”