Unsaid Words

It was not the love at first sight. I had seen her many times before. Though she never noticed me at all. There was no reason for her to look at me. I was an ordinary guy with no extraordinary quality. It was not that I was thinking about her. But it was really not OK, when she didn’t see me standing near her anytime.

She had that charisma in her personality that she was always surrounded by people. Though I was also there many times, but unnoticed.

Her indifference was damaging me from inside. This neglecting attitude was killing me. I tried all possible ways to be in forefront.

And then, she looked at me once and just looked away. It felt like, I was not existing. It felt worse, as if my presence meant nothing to her. I felt insignificant.

In despair, when did I start to stare at her, I didn’t realize.

But girls get to know, when someone stares at them. And she caught me staring at her, looked back at me. Our eyes met. An eye contact at last, but she had already looked away.

That one glance encouraged me to show my feelings to her.

Soon again, she saw me. Our eyes locked. I realized, she wanted to see me more. Or if she was trying to observe my feelings. I just wanted to drown in her eyes. But she blushed and moved her eyes away.

Thereafter she started taking glances at me. I was in awe of her. She held me spellbound. Before I could know, I fell in love with her. I had developed feelings for her, a lot of feelings. She also tried to find out excuses to come near me. But we could not gather courage to say something. But our eyes could not hide emotions. They said everything.

But then I realized, this was not that I needed from my life at that point of time. I had different plans. I had to weigh my thoughts and turn them over. I stepped away. I started ignoring her and distanced myself.

I still love her, but with time, I learnt how to control emotions. Some feelings need to be controlled. Some words are meant to be unsaid. Some relations don’t have any name.