Just Kidding

Dear you,

I'm writing this letter just to say that after all these years, I miss you. You - the kid who still dwells somewhere within me. But I can't find you even after searching the depths of my soul that lay enveloped within the cob-webs of a forgotten past. I still remember the purity of your innocence, the exhilaration of your impish smile and the perks of a carefree life that you are enjoying. I don't know where I have lost those precious gifts of life in the long run. But I'm happy that you still cherish them.

I know you have dreams of growing -up and becoming someone like me. But I must warn you, it's a bad bargain. You won't like turning into a money-spinning robot who is left with nothing but anxiety, stress, and depression at the end of the day. I know you have your own worries. I understand that you are worried about your mathematics exam, your teacher's wrath and a good beating from Dad as an aftermath. But there are more dreaded things that I have to fear. There are macabre deadlines, herculean targets to be achieved and never-ending pressure of work. Your worries are trivial when compared to mine. And that's why I crave to be you again.

I still remember how others used to laugh at your honest opinions about them. Whereas, my opinions are considered as criticisms and accusations that may lead to war. You own the right to open-up with anyone and say anything you wish to. They just laugh it away by saying, "he's just a kid." But as an adult, I might have to pay a huge price for the "just kidding" sort of stuff. Even my silly jokes may bring about a rift.

After going a lot ahead in life when I turn back to look at you, I feel really jealous of you. I just want to take a U- turn and become you again. And live a life that flows freely like a gushing spring, bubbling with bliss. I know you must be thinking that I've lost my mind. As a grown-up, don't I understand that life has neither re-takes nor U-turns? It moves in one and only one direction - ahead. I know its not possible for me to be you ever again. Once a tiny moment is lost in the vigorous flow of life, it's lost forever. We can cherish it only in our memories, thereafter. Then you must be wondering why am I even writing this letter to you. Maybe, I'm just kidding!

With lots of love,

Me