The sky is slowly waking up from another night of full moon. A bright red blemish of the sun is peeping its way through the clouds. The horizon is dressed in fading stars and watching all this is. You?
Surprisingly, in all the days you have managed to slog past in the gone yesterdays, today you have woken up to witness that phenomenon you have always slept through - the dawn.
"Oh, so this is what it feels like. Good to know!" you mumble.
Breathing in the fresh air and letting the breeze wake you, you crawl out of that god awful comfortable bed of yours.
“What about a cup of joe?” comes your mom’s call.
“Yea, right on time mom!” as always your ears are greeted by her welcoming sound.
“Mom! Mom where are you? What is happening?” you sprint from the bedroom into the kitchen.
There is no one there. The wooden shelves closed and dusty, kitchen table piled with fruits and cereals. You are reminded of it all. The pain, the stab in your chest reminded in a flash - the rains, hospital, heart attack, burial, funeral, and mom. She chose to leave you on a similar morning. Two dawns back.
"No, mom. No coffee! How can I forget?" you run your shaking hand through that ruffled up hair of yours and laugh at your silly miserable self.
"She can’t make coffee. She is dead. Gone and dead," reminds your brain.
After a hopeless half an hour of culinary attempt in your empty kitchen, you decide to take a walk and have that cup of coffee later.
Outside the apartment, the sky is still waking up and the world seems to be in deep sleep. The cute newspaper guy, cycling his way through the washed up one-way gives me a faint smile.
"That guy chases the dawn with his newspapers every day, lucky him. By the way when am I ever going to learn cycling?" chats away my loquacious morning thoughts. That is when my thoughts opened up to those words. There are oh-so-many things that I wanted to do. Learn cycling, maybe cooking, rock-climbing and yoga and the list couldn’t seem to find its finish line.
"Mom always said that she wanted to learn painting," piped up my wounded heart. I saw that dawn like I have seen no other, filled with my tomorrows answering my questions about how to exist without mom.
I was torn in between. Should I just finish up my walk and get my coffee on the way to the office? Or should I try something new today?
I did indeed finish up my walk and went back to stare that empty kitchen and its table and said out loud.
“I am going to learn to make good coffee today! Just like the way mom makes it.”
And that was the first thing I stroke out from my trying - new things list, no more a to-do list, but a list that had me doing stuff that I would never have otherwise if I had not woken up all scared and calling for mom that dawn.
Yes, my trying-new-things list. One morning start living your dream too. Reach out and find the courage to bridge that gap between the life you lead and the one you want to lead.
Trust me, it makes all the difference.