The Paradox

Is it all an emotion of itself or a state of mind in itself?

This question will be pondered upon always by one’s self

Have you unearthed the indescribably addictive feelings of ecstasy?

Mania, a heightened ego of grandeur; unaware that I a living recklessly

I do not need much rest, nor do I want to sleep

Too many spectacular ideas which I desire to pursue and keep

Enclosed in a psychiatric ward with an abundance of time for activities

Yet somehow time seems to be lacking, I cannot encompass all of these festivities

It is all together futile to maintain attention on one task

My thoughts are simply racing, they are accelerating far too fast

My mind, body and soul, are completely out of unison

But the weight of depression is gone, a much yearned conclusion

Joy and motivation returned, although a muddled confusion remains

But letting it go on for far too long, medication leaves the body drained

My sociability comes back, which is followed by elation

But no concentration and irritability ends up leading to frustration

Racing chasing thoughts; my body cannot keep on pacing

Then back into depression is hopelessly what I am facing

I am irritated now by everyone and everything around

The whole vicious cycle spinning; it continues to go round and round

The only thing that I can write about now is how I am feeling

I cannot hide this paranoia and fear of myself that I have been concealing

Yet I do not distress and neither shall you as I will be back again

And when I come back and I am myself it will be me exactly the same

This roundabout I have got stuck on will eventually stop spinning

Then I will be back, back to the start, at the very beginning

There may be many battles to fight and possibly many more

But in the end, I know I am strong and thus I will eventually win the war