Let Them Fly

A bird was trapped in a net,

Flew in his thought,

One who made everyone smile,

Himself is in such a plight today.

We all are fragile and sensitive bags full of love, We just need somebody to carry it, and the most beautiful thing in this is that we can be carriers of each other.

This story is about a father and a Son. Let me be more specific here. It is based on my relationship with my own son, so the risk of losing the truth which is generally lost in translation is zero here.

When my son Aakash was born, and I first took him in my arms, I loved him wholeheartedly without any restriction. In the starting years, I used to spend all my free time with him.His one look, one glimpse of him made me forget all the stress, fatigue, tiredness of all day. Whenever he heard some music , tunes anywhere, he played the perfect replica of it in flutes, banjo. He solved the riddles, puzzles, in no time and expressed himself by the innovative gestures . In the evening time I took him to the park with the other kids of our colony who used to sit in a circle in the society compound and do fun activities which majorly included solving the riddles but gradually I noticed something Abnormal in my son.

He had not said a single word till the age of three and the other kids did not want to play or even look associated with him; he was not able to respond to them at all. They made fun of him because he is very slow and after a point of time the whole society collectively declared him MAD.

I consulted a doctor and he recommended some developmental tests. My son was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder. Like the other kids with whom he used to play, I also didn’t handle it well.

My love for him started fading away when I looked at the society and it kind of seeps in me and taints it drastically.

I put a mask on him to cover his face so that the neighbours would not ask any unnecessary and full of sympathetic questions through their facial expressions or eyes. I started being cut-off from society. I did not allow my child to play with other children because I had this fear in me that they would make fun of him. But he was only a child and often used to come out to play with other kids after I went to the office or when I went outside for other household work.

Then I did the most cruel thing in the history of humanity, for which I could never forgive myself and will be embarrassed for my whole life.

I started tying him with chains at home whenever I had to go out so that he could not go out and threw dirt on my “Status” in society. I made him stop playing flute, banjo, piano and other instruments which were the sole reason for his happiness because I didn't want other people to hear those and ask about him. I wanted to forget his existence . I was filled with rage and anger that I just wanted to yell at him" Why just can't you be normal?.

Due to this behaviour of mine,after Some time he stopped singing also.

I decided to home-schooled him but when he turned five , I noticed that his confidence ,self- esteem, and self- respect started getting lower and lower. Whenever some guests visited our house I locked him inside the bathroom so that no one could see and ask about him.

One day, while walking in the park I was watching kids playing in the field and my heart again went numb and as usual after cursing my fate, I sat on a bench in the park. After some time, when it was dark , I started moving towards my house, when I reached the exit of the park, the same kids who were playing in the field , now playing “solve the riddle” sitting in a circle. I overheard one riddle

Riddle: : A bird was trapped in a net,

Flew in his thought,

One who made everyone smile,

Himself is in such a plight today.

Suddenly the name of aakash came out of my mouth and after listening to me, all the kids went up to me and started asking me about aakash and How he is and told me that they all miss aakash.

It was that moment I got the answer to the biggest riddle of my life. It was not the Autism or Aakash or even the people of society who were the reason for my misery and unhappiness but it was ME only. It was my weakness, my inferiority complex which was restricting my child to fly and It was me only who was coming in between my son and his happiness.

I remembered the promise I made with myself at the time of his birth that “no matter what”, I will love my son unconditionally.

When those dark clouds rolled out of my mind, gradually I realised that I had learnt a lot from him. Like the world, I also used to admire things which are tangible in nature or practically visible. But, the innocence, pure love embedded in him taught me to love unconditionally and that is the true meaning of love.

This has been a cathartic experience. Now I am ready to accept my son’s difference. I respect who he is and not what I want him to be. I realized this later that the people who were making fun of my child , Do I agree with them or “I don’t care what they all say, “ I’ am going to be let my kid be himself”

This disorder which I used to curse all the time that it had made my life worse, and why god chose me only for this misery later gave a reality check that it was actually a boon for me and my family.

One day in school when my son sang a song on a perfect pitch without even using an instrument , that magical moment rearranged all the students and teachers mind and replaced all the disgusting thoughts and feelings with just one emotion and that is Love and respect for him.

It took me some time to realize that this was not a Disable but he was Differently abled and was Born genius with unlimited potential.

Presently he is working as a music Teacher in a reputed music school.

Lastly I just want to say to all the aakashs out there, you all are God’s gift to us' ‘the so called normal people” who taught us the real meaning of love but your “carrier” has just not told you this.

So, Let me have this opportunity and utmost pleasure to tell you

Dear Son ,

You have taught me the real meaning of Unconditional love, I have changed for the better because of you. Whenever I am on the verge of losing my sanity, your one look, your voice rearranges my heart and again places it in its right place.

I Love You Son, because of you I’ am what I ‘am today and I cannot ask for more. You complete me.

And to all the fathers of all our Aaakshs out there who never expressed their feelings to them, but trust me it is harder for them to share their feelings. And Isn’t Love is the only feeling in the world that makes it more beautiful when you express it.

When you accept your child who he/she truly is, that is the moment you become a True Parent.

Trust me you are hearing this from the horse’s mouth that love will return back to you and you will be happy again. This will be the most profitable investment of love in which ten times of return is guaranteed.

LET THEM FLY