Eternal Sunshine Of MY Spotless Letters

Every famous, prosperous or well-to-do one's has at least one quality or some sort of weird habit. For example, Mahatma G. loved fresh milk of goats which have brown colored curved horns. Mr. Iqbal had a deep obsession for different types of coal in his hookah , and Doctor Johnson’s obsession for coffee was on another level, he was always in continuous hunt of that unique coffee, which he hd tested in the jungles of Africa with a sole aim in mind that one day his quench , this never ending quest, this thirst will be satisfied one day.  

Fortunately my exclusive talent is not the slave of any pity taste buds or depend on any sort of senses . Boosting my ego, growing my personal weeds, more precisely saying my talent is "Not to reply to the mail of these so called noble, gentle, poor and honest people. These foolish beings write to me for their money they had once given me or asking for favours like writing the introductions in their unpublished books etcetera.

I am totally aware of the fact that you are confused in naming my dynamic personality here .Either I'm an stupid fellow at idiocy level or intelligent at genius level. 

Stupid, because if I had gotten the opportunity and platform in showcasing my talent then why would I stop just at one skill , knowing this fact that I myself is a giant pool , full of qualities which overflowing inside me. That’s where my humbleness and modesty comes into picture, which are simultaneously growing with the size of my intelligence inside my super computer- like brain . I just can’t help it as it is a by default process.

Let me shade one leaf of my intellect from my tree of wisdom on you also. I would be lying if I say that rich people’s absurd habits are presented publicly with plenty of levels of sugar coating on them and then hide its disgusting and sickening parts with the silver lining of normalizing it.

It is a universal fact that Big guns never ever give spaces in their magazines and barrels to terribly tiny bullets in their hammer.They need to become missiles for getting a trigger head from these big guns. If you don’t believe me try an AK-47 on your head, you would definitely understand the meaning of the above lines in the most crystal clear way possible.

Shading another leaf of my perfection here:

Last year I wrote a letter to the world's supreme nuclear power leader , Mr. Vladimir Putin . It was something like this:

“My dear brother Putin!

Please don’t be upset for addressing you in this manner. I have used ‘Brother’ word for you because like you I am also a torchbearer of this patriarchal male chauvinist society, which works on the basic principles of domestic violence and abuses with the backup support of psychos and freaks.

As a member of this everlasting community, progressing in leaps and bounds which is blossoming like no flower has ever had, I wanted to ask a question to you

What are you doing ?

I mean why are you dropping bombs and missiles on Ukraine. Bro! I have never been to Ukraine but trust me , half the population lives there , surely have the potential to be the members of our highly reputed society and if unfortunately some of them misled by this new wave of feminism and believes in this concept of morality and equality then you can trust my talent and polished skills from my ancestors who are practicing this since ages, i can do this alone and put these astray people right back on the masculine misogynistic tracks .

Listen Pal! I know these ukrainians are not godly individuals or even nice people per Se . Infact I have some personal grudges to the ministers of this country and that too geographically but that I will share with you in our next conversations , which I believe would be very frequent after this token of Love and affection.

 The point is they are not at all good people but it doesn't mean that you demolish their very existence and destroy them from their core parts and remove their name from the world map.

The most important thing here is that they are normal heterosexual human beings and they have all the rights to live their life on this mighty earth . Yes, It would be a totally different case altogether if they were those slimy, creepy, unnatural homosexual people then, believe me I would not have raised even the knuckle of my smallest finger on your decision of killing them this way because they deserve all of this . Then , this mercilessly killing massacre would have the motive of justice to save the whole mankind from these no-people .

Then, the history will remembers this war as Revolution/Evolution of humanity 

This "without a Backbone community, they themselves did not care for their roots .Then why should we, Right?

I understand that you are a very busy person and always surrounded with people for work. So, I will not take much of your time and just conclude my mail by ordering you to stop this nonsense fight right away and apply your precious gunpowder and nuclear missiles in a better way .(If you know what I mean)

Waiting in reply to your answer and a small apology from your side would be highly appreciated.

Still waiting for his reply.

Like this, I have wasted many leaves from the branch of my geniuses to many politicians, sports persons and actors and actresses but never got a single mail or call from any one of them. I have overheard these statements about myself by the power of eavesdropping about what people think around me 

Since my childhood the one thing which has troubled me is my own anger. Fear is a very difficult thing. I'm hundred percent sure these celebrities got panicked by my terrorfull words which are always dipped into the truth of horror.

Lastly , from these ten years of my experiment with the letters, for not getting any reply from any body , I have derived a theory from it which is as follows:

 Not replying to somebody’s mail releases a happy chemical from our body named as Dopamine which no hardcore sex or any world's most costliest alcohol or any good or bad news or even the high intense power yoga or meditation could ever provide that sort of kick.Any foolish person is capable in answering the mails but it does need that extra mile of courage and supreme level of geniuses in not replying to somebody’s mail.

Financially also, Not replying is a deal of hundred percent savings and full proof profit. Internet, electricity, battery life of mobile phones , so much you can save and through these savings you can save a significant amount of money which is enough to pay your tailor’s bills. 

Pay your bill and be happy. Be grateful to god that it has given you this opportunity to pay at least one of your bill in this recession.

THANK YOU.